All the Things I Didn't Know

When I reflect on the past and my personal experience with my children's special education, I often feel a host of negative emotions.

Regret. Anger. Disappointment.

Frustration. Anxiety. Overwhelm.

And even despair.

The situations that gave rise to these negative emotions might have been avoided with the knowledge I acquired on the way. All the things I didn’t know had a direct and lasting impact on my children. Knowing my kids might be in a better position now if I knew then what I know now causes me much pain. Please know they are in a great spot now and they have always had phenomenal people in their lives. But there are many instances I would have handled differently if I'd had a full understanding of my and their rights.

My letters to you are meant to instill hope, and I know so far this letter has been heavy and sad. So here is the hopeful part. The same situations that caused me anger, anxiety, overwhelm, and despair are the same situations that taught me. And I am committed to sharing those lessons with you.

Being on this side of the experience gives me a new set of emotions.

Encouraged. Grateful. Uplifted.

Satisfaction. Calm. Confident.

And especially hope.

If navigating the special education process is making you feel how I used to feel, I want you to know I'm here to help. Let me share with you all the things I didn't know.

With Love, Light & Gratitude, Janell

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